5 times I find it's simple to go screen-free for my kids

Above photo: http://www.megankhichiphoto.com/

I love my phone as much as the next person. I use my phone for work, entertainment, reading and listening to books, taking pictures, and countless other things.

Personally, I can't stand being in social situations with a person who is constantly on their phone and I know my kids have to feel the same way.  It doesn't feel good to be the only one who is fully present in a situation, whether you're 2 or 150 years old.

I always try to extend the same respect and common courtesy to my children that I do my peers and I find that, with screentime specifically, the payoff is high.  When I'm more present with my children, they're better behaved, they're more willing to leave me alone when I need a break, and I am more patient.  I don't feel like every question or silly thing they tell me is a disturbance in my day or whatever I might be trying to do and I'm able to actually enjoy their company.  I don't feel like I'm just rushing them through their day.  And, maybe most importantly, I feel I'm setting a good example for them for future technology use/abuse.

I'm FAR from screen-free but one of the simple things I do to limit my screentime and be more present for my children is set specific hours or situations during which I am completely screen-free around them.  Here are the times I've found it's easiest to go screen-free:

1. In the mornings before school.  I make a conscious effort to NOT be on my phone when my 4-year-old comes into our room to say good morning.  Sometimes I wake up before him and quickly check on things (I'm trying to rid my routine of this habit as well, for my own sanity) but once I hear him walking in, I quickly put my phone down and we talk about the day ahead.  Sometimes we pick my phone up to check the weather and decide what to wear to school, but after that, I try to leave my phone in my room when we go downstairs for the entire morning routine.  We have breakfast together, pack lunches and backpacks, get dressed, brush teeth, read some books, and by the time we know it it's time to leave for school.  There's so much going on in the mornings that having my phone on me just makes things unnecessarily complicated.  On mornings that I do have my phone nearby now, I feel overwhelmed by its presence.
2. At school pickup.  I always leave my phone in the car when I walk into school to pick the kids up.  I've just had a full 4 hours to myself and I want them to know that I'm refreshed and ready to give them some of my time.  The last thing I want them to see when they look out into the vestibule is my head buried in my phone.  From start to finish, this is about 15 minutes screen-free and there's no reason I can't give that to them.  An added bonus to this one: I'm available to talk to the other parents, teachers, and administrators.
3. In the car.  Obviously, we should all be screen-free in the car at all times for safety reasons, but we all know we slip from time to time.  When I'm in the car with my kids I put my phone in the console of my car and try not to touch it at all, even to toggle with the music.  They know that in the car, they get almost my undivided attention and for that reason, some of our best conversations have happened in the car.  My 4-year-old plays word games (we try to come up with words that start with a certain letter, rhyming games, etc.), and my 3-year-old loves to sing all the songs he knows.  Even if I'm not the one driving, I try to stay screen-free in the car.
4. At mealtimes.  We all know how it feels to sit across from someone at a table while they stare at a screen.  In a word: crappy.  I don't usually eat at the same time as my kids but I still put down my phone and sit with them while they eat.  Sometimes they want to have conversations, sometimes we read books or play with Play Doh or stickers.  Sometimes they jump around like maniacs while I tell them over and over to sit down and eat.  Either way, I try to stay off my phone.
5. Between dinner and bedtime.  Ah, the golden hour.  OR, the witching hour.  My kids go to bed super early these days so there is only about an hour between dinner and bedtime.  Sometimes they spend this hour making me insane because they're overtired but most of the time, they give me some space to clean up dinner while they play together. Then we pick out a bunch of books to read, pictures to color (they love to help me with my adult coloring books and I am able to suspend my OCD and let them), or a puzzle to do together, and we start winding down for the night.  They love this time of day when they get my full attention and making sure my phone is in a completely different room has helped me love it even more.  It's a nice end to the day and then I'm able to pick up my phone and actually focus on anything that needs to be focused on or just unwind reading a book or scanning social media.

In my effort to simplify and be more present in 2019, one of the things I've found that really helps me with this already is the new "Screen Time" feature on my iPhone. I have it set to 1 hour of social media daily and no apps at all between 10pm and 7am. I've only been doing this for a few days now and I already feel like a freer person. I still get my social media time (which I also need for work), but I am using it much more intentionally and getting more out of the limited time I do have. Overall, I am happier when my phone isn't a huge presence throughout my day and my kids have been the driving force behind helping me realize that.

Do you have any tips for staying off your phone and present in your life? If so, please share!